The Tunnel Of Sin

M

2009-11-15T09:39:08Z

Missing people sucks. I miss hitomi. I miss josh . I miss friends from work. I miss Jen and nick. I try to meet up with people but it seems like so many are to busy or don't care. Or in the case of josh hate me for no reason. This shot sucks.

alphonsenemo @ 2009-08-23T13:30:00

2009-08-23T17:31:05Z

Your result for The 4-Variable IQ Test...

Interpersonal

40% interpersonal, 35% visual, 15% verbal and 10% mathematical!

Your strongest type of intelligence is Interpersonal. You thrive when thinking about people, social situations, and human interaction. That's very touching. You are very likely to be empathetic, sympathetic, and in general, less pathetic, than most other test takers.

Your specific scores follow. On any axis, a score above 25% means you use that kind of thinking more than average, and a score below 25% means you use it less. It says nothing about cognitive skills, just your interest.

Your brain is roughly:

40% Interpersonal

35%Visual

15%Verbal

10%Mathematical

Matching Summary: Each of us has different tastes. Still, I offer the following advice to the world.

1. Don't date someone if your interpersonal percentages differ by more than 20%.

2. Don't be friends with someone if your verbal percentages differ by more than 25%.

3. Don't have sex with someone if their math percentage is over 50%.

Take The 4-Variable IQ Test at HelloQuizzy

alphonsenemo @ 2009-08-18T01:40:00

2009-08-18T05:56:13Z

ive seen 163 of these 239 movies

If you've seen more than 85, you have no life apparently...There are 239 films on this list. Copy this list, go to your own account, paste . Then, put x's next to the films you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number. Have fun.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
(x) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( )Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
( ) Airplane
Total: 8
(x) The Princess Bride
(x) Anchorman
( ) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
(x) Saw
(x) Saw II
(X) White Noise
() White Oleander
(x) Anger Management
(x) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
( ) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 17

(x) Scream
(x) Scream 2
(X) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
(x) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(X) American Pie 2
(X) American Wedding
(x) American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 27

(X) Harry Potter 1
(X) Harry Potter 2
(X) Harry Potter 3
(X) Harry Potter 4
(x) Resident Evil 1
(x) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
() Little Black Book
(x) The Village
(X) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 36

(x) Finding Nemo
( ) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
(X) The Grinch
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
() I, Robot
(x) Robots
Total so far: 44

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
( ) Deep Impact
(x) KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
(X) Eight Crazy Nights
(x)Joe Dirt
( ) KING KONG
Total so far: 53

( ) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(X) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
(x) Final Destination
(x) Final Destination 2
(x) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
(X) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber
Total so far: 61

(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(X) Chicago
(x) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
() Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam
( ) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far:67

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
(x) Seed of Chucky
(x) Bride of Chucky
(X) Ten Things I Hate About You
(X) Just Married
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
() Remember the Titans
() Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
(x) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
(x) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 80

(x) Bad Boys
(x) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
(x) Lucky Number Slevin
( ) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
( ) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
( ) Predator I
( ) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x)Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
() Curious George
Total so far: 87

(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(x) ET
(x) Children of the Corn
(x) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 95

( ) Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
( ) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
( )The Terminator
( ) The Terminator 2
( ) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 99

(X) X-Men
(x) X-2
(x) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
(x) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
( ) The Skulls
( ) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
(X) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 111

( ) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
(X) Old School
(x) The Notebook
(x) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
(x) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old Virgin
Total so far: 118

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
( ) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
( ) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
( ) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total so far: 121

( ) Baseketball
(x) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
(x)House of 1000 Corpses
(x) Devils Rejects
(x) Elf
(x) Highlander
(x) Mothman Prophecies
(X) American History
( ) Three
Total so Far: 128

(x) The Jacket
(x) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
(x) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
() Willard
Total so far: 135

(x) High Tension
(x) Club Dread
() Hulk
(x)Dawn Of the Dead
( ) Hook
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
(x) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld
Total so far: 141

(X) Kill Bill vol 1
(X) Kill Bill vol 2
(X) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
(x)the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) The Last House on the Left
(x) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
Total so far: 147

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(X) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(X) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(X) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(X) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total so far: 153

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
(x) The Matrix Revolutions
(x)Animatrix
(x) Evil Dead
(x) Evil Dead 2
(x) Team America: World Police
(X) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
(x) Hannibal
Total so far: 163
Now Add them up and...

163

Awesome Day

2009-08-03T01:51:21Z

So yea we had to take Emory and Lydia to get there shots today...FUN....No not at all really. First it turns out that Petco changed the times from 1:30 to 3:00. So we get there early (around 12:45) and decide to get the cats a present since they get really nervous on car rides and even more nervous being out of their house. So I bought them some calming treats and this toy mouse an....a Kitty Play CENTER XD!It has three levels and a swing how awesome! It was kinda expensive but I had the money so why not? Nothing is too good for my sweet little loves. Well after that we decided to go wait at the park for a little bit. Lydia climbed all over my car an Emory sat in the carrier. So we drive back to Petco after a little bit and right as we pull up...EMORY PISSES IN HIS CARRIER AND ALL OVER HIM AND LYDIA. We had to switch them into another carrier that Petco had and clean out theres. I had piss on my shirt and we couldn't clean the Kitties till I got home with them. I felt so bad for my babies but once they got there shots and got home they were fine. They love their play center.

After a little cuddle time with the babies I picked Josh up again and we went to Walmart and got some hooks to hold down the play center (it wobbles just enough to worry me lol). I also got season 12 of South Park.

Also tomorrow the stray cat that had to get its leg amputated is coming back. He has to stay in one of our spare rooms next door for another week or so until he gets used to having his leg amputated. This is a little tricky on Wednesday because we have to bomb the house to get rid of the bugs. Thankfully being the animal savvy house that we are we have enough spare carriers for all the animals.

On another note Jane had kittens...again. She had them a week ago I guess because they were in the truck body and I had no idea (since she hadn't gotten fat at all). She tried dragging them inside and the dogs were freaking out and thats when I noticed a little ball of fluff. So yea now I need to find homes for them. Jane is getting fixed the moment she can. Well thats all the updates I have.

PS. I am reading an awesome book on Holistic care for cats. I REALLY need to show Hitomi's parents next time.

PPS. Hito I am writing you a letter it is just taking me time because I have ADD.

PPPS. Hito I miss you and love you SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much.

PPPPS. I am thinking about getting a tattoo about my hippie family. I want to do a little canoe with stick figures representing us and above it will say "Roe Roe Roe Your Boat" what do you think?

Life is awesome.

2009-08-01T04:45:54Z

I got my car. It is a sexy silver 99' mercury wagon XD. I loves it. I also have to say that Josh and I are back together. He said that he couldn't believe he didn't notice that the only thing that did make him truly happy was me. I guess just a few days a part is enough lol. Also we went to Hitos house. I chilled with Lauren and Josh chilled with Theron up in his room.

Side Note: We found out that the singer Lady Gaga has a penis. I asked Josh if she didn't have a penis if he would do her. He said yes. Josh is gay XD The jokes literally haven't stopped since he said it. So yea make un of him and his love for Lady GagOn.

Lauren dyed my hair purple and blue! I have to put up pics I also went to the mall and bought new clothes (I own a dress now! I haven't in forever). Lauren "bought" me some books lol.

What Kind Of Pokemon Are You? Stole from Hitomi

2009-07-28T17:13:12Z

ok I tried to answer this for Hito and for some reason it won't go on her page so here is the reply for her

You would be a Leafeon cause of your hippie side with nature and they are SUPER cute just like you XD And also any evee evolved form is always strong and badass so it sums you up pretty damn well.

PS. Theron is so a Jynx XD Just look at a pic and tell me it isn't Theron (Joe can be his mister mime lol)

And now here is the meme

THEWHAT POKÉMON ARE YOU?MEME

How it works:

Comment to this post with your username.
Link your friends to your thread.
Comment to your friends' posts with the Pokemon (or type of Pokemon) you think suits them best. Adding why you think your choice suits them is optional.
For those that don't remember the newer Pokemon, a list can be found here.

THEWHAT POKÉMON ARE YOU?MEME

You Make Me Want To Jump

2009-07-28T03:23:41Z

Josh and I just sat on the phone for an hour. I feel so confused. As he says I was the "perfect girl" and "if you can't make me truly happy I'm sure nothing ever will." That is so depressing to think. I want him to be happy with me but even more then that I want him to be happy in general. I would give my life to make his life what it should be.I would give my soul to the Devil himself to do with as he pleases for eternity if it meant he could be truly happy. To have him live in bliss I would walk into hell.

I Feel...

2009-07-27T03:45:19Z

So empty. I couldn't sleep last night until about 8 AM. I finally fell asleep out of exhaustion. I can't sleep anymore unless I pass out. As soon as my head hits the pillow all I can think of is the fact that he is no longer mine. I cry randomly during the day. I spent 2 hours sitting in the rain last night. I kept crying and didn't want to bother anyone at Miyakos so I sat out side. I can't close my eyes even now...I am so tired from last night and I can't sleep. I know that when my head hits the pillow all my thoughts of him will come back. Not that they aren't always on my mind but when I am awake I can control myself for the most part...but when I get comfy and start to drift off all I can hear is terms of endearment that I may never get to hear again. I don't know what to do. I want to be friends with him but I am not sure if I can handle it. Can you sit next to someone you love more then anything and contain yourself? Can you forget about how you feel for them? Can you take a love so deep and make it into friendship? Maybe I am better off just not seeing him. That hurts to think about. Just talking to him on the phone makes me feel better...I wish he would call me even if it was just to say hi (I would love if he asked me how I was doing or if he changed his mind...Oh god I wouldn't know how to express my joy). This hole in my heart is so big I feel like I can't survive. I feel like someone has taken more then a piece of me...I feel like a stranger now in my own body.

I'm Gonna Die Tonight I Swear To God I'm Gonna Die

2009-07-24T20:05:33Z

So Josh broke up with me. Apparently he feels different. He loves me but just not like that anymore. I really think this is it. It is different then before. There was no fight there isn't anyone else...just not the same feelings. Why is it that almost three years of knowing him I love him so much more every day and he just doesn't care? I hate my life.

So Comical

2009-07-08T16:36:41Z

So as I sit here with my dog all I think is how she really should be in a cartoon. The way she looks and what not and the things she does are so funny sometimes. She has such a royal look to her and then she will just do the cutest cartoon like shit. I love her

So Sick T_T

2009-07-05T23:44:47Z

So I have been seriously sick for the past two days. I have swollen glands in my neck and it hurts so bad to swallow that I have been drooling instead of swallowing spit. I have also been so tired that walking downstairs has been a hassle. Thank god for my wonderful BF who has been here for the past three days while my Brother is out of town. He has taken such good care of me. He made me soup and rubbed my back and got me juice and cuddled me and helped me take the dogs out helped with the dishes cleaned up the pee and poop from my brothers dogs and everything else that I couldn't do. I love him so much and I don't know what I would have done without him these last few days. When I tell you I was to tired to go get a drink I am serious...just getting up and walking across the hall to the bathroom was a project. Needless to say I did nothing for the 4th. I don't care though since I got to spend it with my baby ^__^

NEW DOG!!!!

2009-05-04T01:20:41Z

I GOT A DOG!!!!!
So I got a new doggie ^_^. She is a sled dog (Alaskan Husky). She is B-E-A-utiful if I do say so myself. So far she loves the other dogs (My brothers 2) and she wants to be nice with the cats (I say want to because Emory wants to scratch her). So now I have to go through the process of introducing Emory and Lydia to Alley (my new dog). I am going to put her in her kennel in my room and let the cats get used to her being in there. What does everyone think? Does that sound like a good plan? I am trying to fin the safest and least stressful way for ALL the animals to adjust.

survey

2009-04-01T01:27:10Z

1. Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
Yes

2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?
Anytime I have had sex in morning afternoon and night and sometimes through all of them ^_^

3. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
usually the right but I am not to picky

4. Do you masturbate?
Of course I have the sex drive of a fucking jack rabbit. I can have sex all night long and still masturbate when I go home alone later lol

5. How often? Lately?
whenever I go to sleep. Helps me have good dreams ^_^

6. Have you ever taken your clothes off for money?
I think once on a bet I ran down the street with my top off. Does that count even though I had on a bra and it was at 4 in the morning?

7. Do you prefer showers or baths?
Baths, if I have a huge bathtub

8. Have you ever had sex in the shower or the bath?
yes and it is fun ^_^

9. Do you watch/read pornography?
yes

10. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
I love rough sex....LOVE IT. Aggressive is good I almost always want aggressive.

11. Do you love someone on your friends list?
friendship love yes

12. Do you know all the people on your friends list?
yes

13. Would you choose love or money?
Love

14. Your top three favorite kinks in bed?
spanking
watching/being watched masturbating
bondage

15. Has anyone ever gone beyond your personal line of respect sexually?
yes but I beat the shit out of that guy and I have the record to prove it

16. Where is the most romantic place you have had sex?
Most romantic? in the bushes at my friends place while it was raining. Sounds weird but it was really sweet

17. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
in the gym bathroom

18. Have you ever been caught having sex?
lol yes

19. Have you ever been to a strip club?
No :(

20. Ever been to a bar just to get sex?
no ewww

21. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club for sexual reasons?
No.

22. Ever been picked up in a bar?
Nope

23. Have you ever kissed or had sex with someone of the same sex?
duh of course

24. What's your sexuality?
Bisexual

25. Had sex in a movie theater?
no but have given handjobs and blowjobs

26. Had sex in a bathroom?
yes

27. Have you ever had sex at work?
no

28. Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
Yes.

29. Bought something from an adult store?
yes

30. Do you own any sex toys?
yes I do but not much fun to me

31. If yes, how many and what are they?
1 vibrator

32. Does anyone have naughty pics of you or are you on film?
yes

33. Have you ever had sex with someone and called them the wrong name?
no

34. Have you ever had phonesex?
yes

35. Have you ever had cybersex?
omg yes

36. Do you think oral sex constitutes as a form of intercourse?
no it is foreplay

37. What's your favorite sexual position?
where I flip my legs up to my head and he lifts my ass off the bed and fucks me hard in my girly spot ^_^ I call it the pretzel

38. What's your favorite sex act?
any sex with the most perfect man in the world ^__^

39. Have you ever had sex with more than one person at a time?
no

40. Who do you think has the guts to repost this?
I dunno but people will get a kick out of my answers

New Bands That Everyone Should Check Out

2009-03-24T02:36:38Z

Ok so I found this awesome site called cdbaby.com that has all this indie music on it. I waded through the crap for everyone to bring you three bands that I have found so far that are REALLY good.

First off we have something for our acoustic lovers out there....Love. Story.Hero. This is a short and sweet one just one guy with his guitar strumming out some serious melody while pouring out his heart. Great music I hope he lands a big record deal and makes some new tracks SOON!

Next we have Ice Nine Kills kind of like a more hardcore Dashboard...like if Dashboard and Brand New had a baby and they were starting off on their journey to make some wonderful music. Check them out so you can say "I listened to them when..."

Lastly we have Everlea which is like a Spill Canvas meets Brand New meets a more melodic Boys Night Out. Very good very special very creative please give these guys a listen.

If you like any of these bands and have some extra cash you should support the underground by buying there stuff on CDBABY.COM go there and search for some of your own music share what you like with others remember the only way these people have a chance is if we help them pioneer their material.

The Day Has Come...Will You Survive?

2009-03-18T15:46:32Z

I walk into the building with caution, I have conserved ALL my ammo...I am ready for what lies a head.....Thats what I thought. Just then one of these zombie abominations sees me in the window. I know a big fight is up a head. The prize, my life. Before I know it I am surround, I run to the back thinking my best advantage point would be a closed off section, I feel safe with the steel fence around me, after all what could happen? Just then I hear something to my right, there I am face to face with a zombie...they have learned to climb fences, they are faster, there numbers are vast. I have never experienced such fear, such terror has only be captured in the eyes of a child listening to a horror story.

I know now I was never prepared, all my training was nothing. I pray for the strength to survive. Thats when I see my partner go down, as though I am watching the curtain close on the play of my life. This is the end.....

Thank god for continues ^__^

YES last night Josh got me Resident Evil 5....it is AMAZING better then I thought it could ever be! I was shaking, my heart was pounding...I was Chris Redfield. For the first time in a long time a game has taken me on the journey of the protagonist, I truly felt one with him. I am RE....

alphonsenemo @ 2009-03-13T02:05:00

2009-03-13T06:05:43Z

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	High
Schizoid Disorder:	Low
Schizotypal Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Disorder:	Low
Borderline Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Disorder:	High
Narcissistic Disorder:	Moderate
Avoidant Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! -- -- Personality Disorders --

Always On My Mind

2009-03-03T04:21:29Z

As I sit here at home all I think about is you. I think about your perfect smile and how happy you always were to see me. I think about our lazy afternoons watching TV together or when we would go for a stroll to the park. I think about the fact that we did not just compliment each other we completed each other. Something about you has always made me feel whole made me feel like a real person. I feel as though a part of me had been buried for a long time but managed to dig it up.

I know that in the infinite wisdom you carried (yes despite what some would say you were not only smart but you were wise thee is a difference) you know all the things I could say. That is what was so wonderful about us we never had to say a thing to each other we just knew. I think that night I knew deep down what would happen. A part of me blames myself for that while another part feels like there was an understanding. Something unspoken between the two of us something only we could understand. Even though deep down I know this I still wish I could hold you once again and tell you I am sorry. I am sorry for all the little arguments and the occasional yelling I wish I could have seen that no one is perfect and yet that is the beauty of it all.

We are not perfect and that is what made us perfect for each other. We were both so tired of being hurt and just searching for someone who we could trust someone who would love us for who we are. Someone to love us despite all the damage we had despite all the mental instability despite the how clingy we were. We both wanted someone who would just be ecstatic to see our faces in the morning or when we came home from a long day.

This is what I found in you the same thing you found in me. I think thats why it hurts so much to imagine life without you. You weren't just my dog you were a part of me. I was a part of you and it is never easy or fair to have to be missing a part of yourself. It is even harder when it is such a big part but I promise to never forget what you taught me. I will never forget how to forgive or how to trust or how to love and for that I thank you. Until the day when we can be together again I will have to find peace in the fact that even though I can't see you I know deep down you will always be with me.

I love you Tork.

RIP My Dear Friend

2009-02-25T17:23:23Z

RIP My Dear Friend
I hate to say this. I want to cry typing this but yesterday on February 24 around 9:30 AM my best friend, my constant companion, my shadow....my Tork passed away. I am not sure from what, all I do know is she slipped away in my arms. I already feel lost, for just as I had saved her she had saved me....now I feel adrift in a vast sea with no life boat to grasp onto.

First Meme from Miyako!

2009-02-23T16:56:29Z

1. Can you cook? Very well Thanks
2. What was your dream growing up? To be a vet...still working on it ^_^
3. What talent do you wish you had? Contortion...it is COOL!!!
4. Favorite place? Carribean
5. Favorite vegetable? I dunno....I guess Avocado?
6. What was the last book you read? Marley and Me
7. What zodiac sign are you ? Virgo...that one is the zodiac right? If it is the chinese shit I am the rabbit.
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? 2 tattoos and a helix orbital on my ear.
9. Worst Habit? I pick the skin on my feet XD
10. Do we know each other outside of lj? yes
11. What is your favorite sport? Swimming or diving
12. Negative or Optimistic attitude? depends on my mood
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me? hope that you didn't talk about D&D the whole time lol
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you? My mother dying or grandma hight dying or my uncle dying one of those or all of them.
15. Tell me one weird fact about you: I can't get myself off when masturbating without diddling for an hour straight....and it isn't even the least bit satisfying (unless my BF watches then it is fine)
16. Do you have any pets? A whole lot.
17. Do you know how to do the macarena? unfortunately
18. What time is it where you are now? 11:54 AM
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary? weird... not cute nor scarey, but what the hell is the make-up hiding?
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be? My weight, which I am working on.
21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience? partner, I like doing bad things
22. What color eyes do you have? brown
23. Ever been arrested? lol yes and I would do it all over again
24. Bottle or Draft? bottle
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it? get an apartment and save the rest oh and finish my tatto!
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew? I don't like gum
27. What 's your favorite bar to hang at? Boston Billiards
28. Do you believe in ghosts? yes
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time? workout or have sex
30. Do you swear a lot? yes
31. Biggest pet peeve? not having a place to live with my BF
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself? paranoid
33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you? duh

I <3 U

2009-02-18T22:41:13Z

HITOMI!!!! I DO I miss you like WOAH!!!!! Thought I would let you know.

Drink It Up, Push Him Out

2008-12-10T17:53:30Z

So I came home to a nice glass on Sangria last night. Christian and his girl Amanda had bought a huge jug. I haven't really gotten to hang around Amanda enough. She is awesome. I also met this guy Sam who loves all the music I do. He is starting a band and I told him if he gets me a demo CD I will spread the word through the ranks of my friends. We ended up getting pretty tanked and Amanda and I were rocking out to Glassjaw (which no one had ever heard of....there are now a bunch of Glassjaw lovers in my house). Sam and I talked a storm about Brand New and Taking Back Sunday. He is wicked dedicated to his music, he is like me he loves to know the background to what he listens to. I have to introduce him to Guster. He has some bands he told me to listen to...I can't remember them though because by that point I was gone. I like being that wasted, I don't think about all the shit that upsets me, I just smile and laugh about everything and I am even more friendly then ever.

Well, going to get some of my stuff back from Josh and Chris tonight....aparently I had Joshs MP3 player. I had no clue O_o I would have given it back right away if they had asked...I'm not out to be vindictive or anything. He can have his things whenever he wants them. I have no hard feelings on the whole thing, just hurt feelings. I might go out drinking with Kevin afterward, if not Amanda and Christian already promised me more Sangria when I get home. Should be a good night.

Old Disc New Pics!!!!!!!

2008-12-08T18:11:50Z

I found one of my missing pics disc at Miyakos house! I have uploaded all the pics that I really liked to my myspace (www.myspace.com/alphonsenemo), mad ass Emory pics from when he was a baby....he has gotten a bit chunky. I hate admitting it but maybe a diet is in order for my little tubasaurus-rex. Yes, he is my defauly right now. How could he not be? Look at that irresistable mug! Also I have to down load the pics I recently took of Tom and Lydia. I also uplaoded some other pics. I know I am probably going to get some talk about them from someone. All I can say is right now they make me happy and sad at the same time and I enjoy having the ability to see them whenever I want to.

As for other things, Toms lump is doing good. He seems to be eating a lot more and he is able to purr without that stuck sound in his throat! He is breathing pretty normally, I know he won't live forever but maybe my special man has a little longer then I thought ^__^ I won't say it is years but maybe instead of weeks it will be months now. That would be nice to have a few months to spoil him. Speaking of my little spoiled beast I need to get more tuna and salmon for him. I was also thinking about picking up some pate for him....is that to much? Ah well, who cares he deserves it for being so awesome. I also have to start x-mas shopping O_O I have decided that I am only getting for the little ones in my family and obviously my pets. I want to get a kitty condo for Lydia and Emory. Tom I was thinking of a heated cat bed. The sisters are probably going to get some treats or maybe new dishes ^_^ Tork is the hardest. I want to get her this dog bed that is supposed to be good for seniors on their joints. It is heated and it is huge...I don't know where I would put it. Also it is expensive. Ah well, more to come later!

Shit Hitting The Fan

2008-12-05T01:05:48Z

Wonderful, it is starting to hit me. The whole Josh thing is starting to hit me. Along with the Tom situation. I feel like nothing can go right in my life. Grandma Hights death anniversary is coming up in a few days. My Moms just passed. When will I catch a break? I felt like I was so happy just a little while ago, now it is all taken away so quickly. I actually prayed last night, I prayed that my cat would get better by some crazy miracle. I also prayed that I could be happy like I used to be. I don't even want riches or anything of that sort, I just want to be able to look at the world and find beauty in it. I want to look at the trees and see wonder in the fact that they die and are reborn each year. I want to look at a happy person and feel good for them, not want to punch their faces in. I hate happy people lately. I HATE them. I hate that I can't be that way, I envy them. I feel as though I am becoming the embodiment of Envy and I don't like it. I have never really covetted what others had, not to this extent. I want to take away what all these others have. I know it is most likely because of what is going on right now, but how much can one person takes before they feel that way forever? Sometimes I become petrified that I will end up like all the others, miserable backstabbing hateful people. I am so scared that I am going to lose it sooner or later and just not care about anyone or anything anymore. I am scared of losing my compassion for my pets, my friends, Josh, even people I don't know. I know that helping people I barely know has brought me a great amount of grief but I don't want to pass up the opportunity of helping people that are worth it due to people having hurt me in the past.

I wish I was home right now with my cat, curled up in my bed. I think Emory knows how upset I am, he has been extra cuddly with me lately. I still can't believe Josh just told me straight out that he doesn't care about Emory or what happens with him. Hate me, don't hate Emory. He loves Josh so much, I can tell still that he misses him, but at the same time when I look in his eyes there is almost an understanding there of whats going on. Maybe not fully, but a grasp on the general outline of things. Maybe truly Emory has been so loving due to this, maybe he knows just enough to know things aren't the same and he is seeking comfort just as I am. I just want to go home right now, I don't want to work anymore. I want to surround myself with my pets and love them the best I can. I want to pet Tom and calm Emory with a hug. Well, I only have seven hours till I go home....its not that long and yet I feel like I have been away for years.

I Hate THIS

2008-12-02T17:38:04Z

big surprise,josh dumped me for no reason. Yes I am upset but I have more pressing matters on my mind right now which makes that seem so much less important. My cat Tom had to go to the vet the other day for a lump on his throat. Turns out that the vet is almost positive that it is cancer.When I asked her what we should do she said that it would be best to put him to sleep. They can't operate on him nor get blood tests done. This is due to the fact that he has a heart murmur and he can be put under anesthesia because it could cause his heart to losen where the hole is and he would most likely hemmorage and die. So here I am, holding my best friend, my child having to decide when to let him go,when to say enough is enough. I am not ready to let him go and yet I want him to be happy. I don't want to make him suffer and I am petrified that my want for him to be around will get in the way of my judgement of when to let him go. I can't stop crying. I cryed all yesterday, I had to leave work today because I couldn't stop crying. Even now I can't stop, I am hoping that typing down how i feel will help me to feel better. Truthfully i don't think i will feel better. i feel like i am murdering my cat. I feel like i am going to put him down before it his time or worse hold onto him and make him suffer. I have had him for close to six years now, I have gone through two major deaths in my family with him, two moves to different states, saved him from a 1 1/2 at a pound and in return he has saved me from myself an insurmountable amount of times. He has always been there when I needed him always lent an ear. He is always so happy when I come home, always wants me to cuddle him and love him. He comes to meet me when my car pulls into the drive way and he joins me for our evening meal at night. He is by far one of the greatest cats I have ever been around. I feel like i am dying with him. I don't know what to do.

Wishing I Could Do More For You

2008-09-24T15:47:55Z

Well, all I can say is I wish I could fix everything for you. I wish we had our own place or i had a place that you could live at. I am trying my hardest to make this life worth it for the both of us. Please hold on and before we know it everything will be as it should. We will have our own place and our own bed to snuggle into. I will hold you high as we swim through this choppy water, I promise. We will make it through, you will make it through. Why? Because you are the strongest person I have ever met and on top of that you have true love and a true friendship. People search their whole lives for even one of those things an yet you have both. We are here for you.